Ukrainian Proverbs

A friend lent me a book of aphorisms, A Spartan Conversation, by Ukrainian author Gustav Vodichka (a pen name—you’ll see why in a minute). I understood about half of them, and of those a large portion are untranslatable. Of the remainder, I present a selection which I think provides some insight into Ukrainian thinking.

All the Ukrainian nation received from the Soviet Union was the Holodomor. Everything else went to the oligarchs.

If you oppose both those in power and the opposition—you are of the people.

Dictatorship is when shots are fired into the crowd; democracy is when shots are fired out of the crowd.

In order to increase the standard of living for the people, you must decrease the standard of living for those in power.

You get moral politicians when they see immoral ones hanging in front of them.

The ends justify the bullet.

“It’s good when you have a goal in life,” thought the sniper.

The future lies with the oligarchs—let’s get them out of the way!

Quoting Socrates is not philosophy. Philosophy is thinking like Socrates. [ironic, considering this post is a compilation of quotes…]

The smarter the computer, the stupider the people.

The most difficult age for children is when they ask you to babysit the grandkids.

He took care of me up until marriage, now I have to take care of him for the rest of our lives.

The only things that are absolute are monarchy and crap.

A sign reads, “The gallows in the city square are VIP only.”

The Ukrainian national dish is pig cellulite.